i love you

no matter how hard i try, i can't figure out why it's so difficult to love. we all seem to want to love but when we are alone in a room together, it's not so easy to love. we stare at each other. we blame each other. criticize. i don't think that's what love looks like. love looks like conversation, work done together, snuggling, accepting and the occasional flare up too because if you feel too uptight to blow off steam then it's not love either... it's as though, since the middle ages and the invention of romantic courtly love, we have made no progress at all in conceptualizing and creating viable ways to love one another. we are awkward showing affection, appreciation, acceptance. take a walk on a crowded street, listen to yourself listing all the things that are wrong with this person, with that person. listen to the lies you make up, which is fine, you don't know these people, you're making it all up. but why aren't you making up amazing stories? why aren't you saying, this one is a genius. this one is beautiful. this one is great in bed. this one is so warm and lovable.