dogs

my mother told me that only unsexy women had to wear sexy clothes; that sexy women were not about to create even more of a stir by flaunting themselves. but i think she was horribly jealous of women who had the confidence to wear a stunning dress.

question: i think there is a reality that is sustaining us but that we have no access to consciously. the way there's the two nervous systems, you know? if you had to consciously control your heart or your breathing, you'd fuck it up, so it stays out of your control.

diana: yes. and that's why sages of all times work on creating trust within themselves so that they CAN consiously control events as critical as the heartbeat. i always assumed that my shadow, in jungian terms, had to do with my killer instincts and aesthetics, i mean, it's hard not to believe that i work for the devil, you know what i mean? but my shadow, psychologically speaking, is more prosaic. i am a depressive. a secret sorriness, a stagnant pool. murder is a step up, psychologically that is.

question: i am part dog.

diana: that's interesting. and somewhat unexpected.

question: when i was a baby, my parents left me in the playpen with our dog who had just had puppies. i was in there with the mother dog and her puppies. i think that has affected me deeply.

diana: you are full of non-sequiturs today.

question: everything is a non-sequitur.

diana: did you eat enough? you sound morose.


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